Author: kazbah33pics

I am not a dog. Yes, all right, I did bite Sooz this morning while she was roughing me up (heh heh, I should have said “ruffing” me up) out at the washing machine. It’s her own fault – she could have taken noticed of the manical (Kaz’s description) look in my eyes and backed away at any point before her arm and my teeth shared the same time and space. Yes, there was blood, and, soon after, a slathering of Savlon cream … so she should be okay. I hope she is because she is the back-up feeder, tray-clearer and player should anything happen to Kaz.

But, back to the “I am not a dog” thing. There is absolutely no reason for Kaz to insult me by telling me to go get my stringey thing … we’ve done that before – but she has never ever before pointed out to the lounge (where we both know stringey thing is) and told me to “FETCH”.  What was she thinking? Oh wait, she really wasn’t. Or she’s gone mad – as in “crazy, insane, loopy”.
And speaking of stringey things, one of them didn’t make it.

It was the home-made one which Kaz had lovingly (she says) fashioned together from a stick (from another past stringey thing), some blue wool she inadvertantly brought home from a baby shower (Do they toss yarn balls at those things?  Could be fun.) and some rubber bands. It was a bit unwieldy – the wool was too long and there wasn’t enough weight at the end – but Kaz could make it work and we had hours of fun with it. But it’s gone now … until she gets off her own very big large humongous gigantic bottom (that’s what she gets for the dog thing) and finds the tape and fixes it. 

It is so nice having both Mummies home most of the day. They have been here for the last three days – since they went into “lock down”.  Before then they could both be gone for hours and hours – now they’ve gone for less than an hour at a time, and usually one of them stays home to keep me company.

I’m glad they’re not going out there much – it’s been raining a fair bit and I’m glad they’re not getting wet because if they do they’re going to catch a cold and then they’ll have the sniffles and people will make then go get CoVid tests. That might be all right though as long as they don’t have it – because they’d have to stay at home, self-isolating, until the results came back. Wouldn’t that be fun! We’d all love spending a whole lot of quality time together. Kaz could take photographs of me all the time;  Sooz could read to me as we both stay warm on the electric blanket. Ideal. Idyllic. Sublime. And I could get a thesaurus. No, that’s not a type of dinosaur … but I’d like one of those too please … as long as it didn’t want to eat me, or chase me, or present my body to Kaz and Sooz as some type of cat-like present. That’s my job. OMG … and wouldn’t it be fantastic to see my dinosaur – let’s call him Rex – give Kaz’s legs little hugs and kisses like I do. Ahhh. Talk about sharing the love. And let’s see them even think about trimming his claws or trying to lock him out of the bedroom at night. Not going to happen. Poof. Of course it’s not going to happen – at least not until I master cloning technology.

Meanwhile, back in the real world, I heard them talking before and it appears that lockdown has now ended … and they will be going off to meet up with Aunty M and the others tomorrow. That’s a shame. I’ll miss them … but don’t tell them that!

They keep telling me that I am “nor-ty” and after some time on the internet and with a dictionary, I have worked out that they actually mean “naughty”.  It’s because I’m always trying to go outside with them when they leave the house … even if it’s just to make the rubbish disappear – where does it go?  They really are serious about keeping me inside (except when I’m in that dratted 4H) … and I know this for sure because yesterday Kaz hit me as I tried to get out – with the screen door! She managed to give me a good biff and while they both said it was an accident I was lucky I wasn’t moving any faster because she could have taken my head off with that thing!  I think Kaz thought I had a concussion afterwards because she kept coming in to the Penthouse (sweet!) while I was (trying to) have my afternoon nap to “check on me” which included making sure I was awake and then moving her finger back and forth and up and down in front of my face and telling me to “follow the finger” – she’s lucky I didn’t clamp my jaws on it after the third time.

I did get to sleep with them in the bedroom last night!  I’m sure Kaz didn’t on purpose intend to let me in at 4am after she’d been out to the kitchen … but I was in there and under the bed before she could stop me.  Something has definitely changed though because other times she has tried to lure me out – with the stringey thing, or with cookies, or calling me (yeah, like that has any chance of working) … this time she didn’t do any of that … she just turned off the light on her watch and jumped back in to bed.  It surprised me and then I realised she was just playing possum until she lulled me into thinking she was asleep so I would jump on to her bedside table to turn her sleep machine off (it’s so funny when she wakes up when the air stops) or to chew on the tube – and then she would corner me and shoosh me out.  But no … when I finally came out to look, she had most of the tube under her pillow and she was sleeping with her hand over the off switch … clever girl!  So I had a wander over the bed head, knocked a couple of things off, and when Sooz woke up to say hello, she patted the bed beside her so I jumped in.   That electric blanket really is warm.  And Kaz is so heavy that no matter how much I tried to push her out of the bed with my paws, she wouldn’t budge!  Just as well there was (just) enough room in the bed for the three of us!